The last few days since we have been home have been a blur. We started out today heading to Tyler’s doctor appointment that is actually scheduled for Monday (not today!) We figured that out half-way to the appointment.
We left Shanghai (luckily before this week’s typhoon hit) on Monday September 12th. Security at the airports (at least in Shanghai) is very interesting. As you enter the airport, you send all bags (purses, backpacks and luggage) through security, while a person hits you with the “bomb powder test” wand. Then you go to the sloth-like (as the kids called it – referring to the Zootopia sloth) check-in for tickets. While the woman logs in your tickets and looks up and down at you 10 times to make sure that your facial features still match the passport that she just checked 9 previous times, and it helps that your newest is starting to get very antsy and scream in line making it an overly pleasant experience. We were also told that our gate “might change” but that the agent wasn’t sure at this time. This should have given us a good idea of how the rest of the day would go……
After we finally received our boarding passes, we moved to security line number two, where we stood for another 30 minutes. In Shanghai, they don’t allow you to clear security as a family, so each of your children has to be handed his own passport, boarding pass and ID card (no matter how young!) That sets parents almost into a panic that mandates a personal GPS wanting to be attached to each document. Once the second check of looking at you 10 times to verify that you haven’t changed your passport picture from the ticket window to the second security check, you re-send all bags through security again and then go through the security door to be re-wanded again individually (allowing your newest to practically run through the door to the end of the security belt without you).
By this time, we checked the board of all flights to find that 1) our gate had moved from 210 to 20 and 2) that our flight was randomly boarding in 20 minutes (over 1 hour ahead of time?!), so we raced the kids through the terminal getting the to next gate area, where we stood in line again with 200 plus people also waiting to board the plane. Charlie went up to gate check the stroller that we had bought the day before. Minutes later, a woman is speaking to me in Chinese telling me to move forward with her with the rest of the kids for Sky Priority boarding. Minutes later, we were at the next check point right at the plane boarding level, as they went through all purses and backpacks once again.
It had already been a long day, so we pushed forward in the plane to the back area of our seats in rows 63 and 64. Because Tyler needed the “2 parent” approach and Ashley has flight anxiety, we sat with them and then put the three other boys in the row in front of us with another Asian man who probably was like “who are these random boys that I am being forced to sit with?!” Those three are good travelers so we knew that they would be fine sleeping and plugging into the vast array of seat movies and shows. On the other hand, Charlie and I should have probably taken a few “extra” of something. I started the first flight service with a beer after fighting Tyler to stay in his seat, use a seat belt (that he had consistently refused all through China) and to stop telling us that he had to go to the bathroom every five minutes, especially as the plane was racing down the runway. This was in the first 15 minutes of flight!!! Only 13 plus hours to go…..then the fun started with him and Ashley – he was touching her legs with his, he was in her space, she wanted to sit where he was sitting but he did not want to give up his seat. Hour two started with “who needs melatonin even though it is only 1 p.m. Shanghai time?!!” Another hour or two of a little bit of sleep (as this was now taking us to US time of 2 and 3 a.m.) and then he awoke and started with the seat DVD. He could not stand the ear buds, but he knew how to work the bud jack, so he spent his hours plugging his ear buds in and out of the jack 500 times, ringing the stewardess call button (by accident as they always seem to put it right where a child’s hand can hit it), asking the stewardess (in Chinese) to bring more chocolate candies to him (too bad Mom quashed that after a quick translation), physically flagging down the drink cart for more cokes (did we mention that he has a sweet tooth and is a coke fiend) and then going to the bathroom 50 more times because they are so lovely and spacious for multiple people on a plane!!!! By the time that we hit Detroit, Charlie and I looked like we had aged about 5 years (not knowing that the next events would age us even more).
Almost 14 hours after leaving Shanghai, we arrived in Detroit to clear US Immigration. As Tyler had to go through the foreigners immigration side, we had to wait in a long line as he proceeded to scream because he had just endured such a long flight and he had no idea what was happening. Just as we hit the line, the ever not so friendly immigration officer screams “shhh, you need to be quiet!” Hmmmm, he has no idea what you just said as he doesn’t speak English and if you had just endured what we had, you might be screaming your head off too, and p.s. we are trying to make him stop. By this time, Ashley had had it, too, so she was heading into rapid meltdown stage and the immigration officer that was checking passports starts rolling his eyes at us and shooting us the “seriously, I don’t even want to help you and don’t come to my window look.” Lucky for him, he was next up in line for us! When we got to his window, Tyler was still screaming so another officer comes over and asks “is he sick?” I said “no, he just flew 14 hours, he speaks no English, he has absolutely no idea what is happening to him in his new life.” So he was very kind and said that he would rush our paperwork through while the new sloth man sat there checking and re-checking our passports with a major sour puss on his face like we were on the Top 10 US Wanted List. Finally they released us to grab bags and to clear customs, only to go to have to re-check bags for the next leg of the flight from Detroit to Philadelphia.
By this time, it was heading towards dinner so we grabbed a quick meal but all of the kids were starting to go downhill with little to no sleep behind them. When we hit the check-in for the next flight, Kyle innocently said to me “wow, there aren’t many kids on this flight” so the ever not so kind woman next to us looks at him and says “well, that means you should be extra quiet then!!” Really??!! I was daring her to sit right next to us…Detroit..the ever NOT so friendly city. Luckily, all of the kids passed out on the next flight which luckily was only an hour long.
When we got to the Philadelphia Airport, Grandmom and Pop Pop Lockhead surprised us with a visit just as we exited the terminal. Then we sped home in our own car (nice to drive after three weeks) and met Aunt Rita at home, as she had kindly just finished doing a little grocery shopping for us. At the same time, our neighbor was nice enough to come over and say hello and to do a little translating back and forth with Tyler. Shortly afterward, everyone got ready for bed and the older kids went straight to sleep. Tyler wandered the house for awhile to make sure that everyone was in a bed somewhere and going to sleep and then he finally passed out on our bedroom floor.
When he had arrived in our home, he was met by our two cats and he was not sure what to think about that. Originally he did not want any cats near him in China, and by the end, he would say “meow meow” if we saw a stray one. But this was a bit different, they were meowing loudly and trying to rub on him. One actually got on a table and this caused him to shout excitedly with something that we could not understand, but he still did not want to be close to either of them. Now, he will readily try and pet one (after a few days of repeating that the cat does not like a full two hand aggressive pet massage — one finger only!) if the cat gets close enough to him. And today, after the cats were done eating their food, he told Charlie something in Chinese and pulled his arm for him to come and see that they were done with their food.
Day Two of our being home started off with an early rise for the “first back to school day” as the kids had all missed the first two weeks of school, while we were traveling. He was so tired that he never even made it up and slept until 11 a.m. that first morning! The rest of the kids were so excited to get back to see their friends and new teachers. They looked like their backpacks were loaded for another week long adventure. By the time that they hit the bus stop, they were like celebrities fielding all kinds of questions about our trip and their new brother.
Charlie went to pick up Murphy at his boarding camp. In China, in the past, dogs were on the menu so again Tyler was not overly comfortable with dogs and was not overly excited as Murphy raced in our house at rapid speed to check out everything that he missed. When Murphy had to ride in the car seat next to Tyler, later in the day, Tyler was going crazy saying something Chinese and pointing at Murphy. Probably like “who are these people that have cats and dogs in their home and they are on counters and in cars with me?!” Now, he is very happy helping Charlie to walk Murphy in the morning, after the kids get on the bus. He also tells us when Murphy is barking outside and wants to come in.
Tyler is quickly getting his routines down. He loves when the kids get home on the bus, and he wants to play with them immediately and is not happy when they have to get their homework done. He has been doing well with all of the food that Charlie has cooked each night, he brushes his teeth (with help) and he expects to take a daily bath or shower. He doesn’t really like showers yet and screams when the water hits his head and face. At bed time, he still prefers to wander around a bit until everyone else is settled and he can settle. A few times, he has fallen asleep on the floor or on our couch and then we just move him to his bed.
He is very funny as he will use the kids as his “helpers” – whether helping him in the bathroom or helping him get his food cleaned up or his hands cleaned. He pulls them around by the hand while saying something to them in Chinese. The boys are still all Geges, although he can say each of their names individually and Ashley is still his Mei Mei.
He has started settling more with routine and has been outside helping us in the yard, has been grocery shopping, been to Target (as everyone has to go to Target), been to a few playgrounds. He has been on the trampoline a few times and is just learning how to jump a bit. At times, he can still make his escape as our neighbor so kindly helped him out of the street yesterday, when Ashley was playing with the little girl next door and Tyler decided to make a run for it, laughing all the way. We are building up his shopping tolerance to about 1/2 hour before he loses interest and decides it is more fun to lie on the store floor or pull things off the shelves. Also, when he is very wild or not following the rules, he has a time-out chair in our living room called the “brown chair” and we are not too excited about having to sit there, so we often curb our behaviors quickly.
He is still a big hugger, but is starting to stop asking everyone to pick him up (thankfully!) He loves when you smell his feet and tell him that they are stinky (that makes him laugh hysterically), and he loves when you blow raspberries on his tummy at any time that he wants (including in the middle of the Dick’s store!) He is now walking around with an electronic ABC tablet so he is starting to listen and repeat a few sounds or repeat what someone else is saying. At this time, he really has no interest in any type of TV programs (probably because he can’t see the TV that well). He has also adopted Ashley’s baby carriage and baby and will race them around the house at times. The first day that he was home, he carried (without help) the entire carriage all the way up our stairs to show Charlie.
He still talks constantly in Chinese to us about everything and anything. He is definitely a very social child. He probably laughs that we respond with something completely unrelated to what he is saying or asking about!
Friday night was the “Back to School Bash” party at our kids’ school. Tyler fit right in and attacked the playground equipment like a pro. (He’s apparently a celebrity already and when Tyler meets the bus after school, the kids all fight over the window seats so they can see him.) He had some trouble figuring out who everyone was, several times walking up to strangers, or grabbing random kids’ hands, thinking they were one of his brothers or sister. The Bash capped off a day of exercise and sunshine for Tyler, who should have NO PROBLEM sleeping through tonight.
This coming week will be his wellness checks, meetings with school to get him enrolled in Kindergarten and then an in-depth eye exam the following week.
We have all dealt with jet lag this week and are trying to get back into our normal routine for school, homework and life in general.